the life of ash

i have finally drawn a line under the whole mr married saga.
i just cant do it any more, its not making me happy and its no fun.
every week he asks to see me and every week i say no. its not fair on him or me. he gets his hopes up and i just get confused.

so i text him and told him to stop asking to see me and he replyed that he understood why and that he wouldnt text me anymore either. im totally gutted but shit happens. i knew what i was getting into and i knew there would be no happy out come. i guess by keeping him close and hanging on i kid myself that there was someone out there who loved me.

live and learn.

im bored.

this time last night i was all excited as my flatmate was going on holiday. so i'd have a blissful week of piece and quiet. i took her and her sister to the airport this morning. now im bored.
ive watched tv, gone clothes shopping, food shopping, cleaned the flat, done some washing, more tv and now i'm playing on the internet and im bored.

did i mention i was bored.

it broing having no one but myself to talk to and its a bit of a one way conversation.

now would be the perfect opportunity to get creative and the art stuff out but im lacking inspiration, hence why ive been on the net.

mr married has asked if he can come round while my flat mate is away, not sure i want him here(as much as i need the company) its been so long and ive been so strong. do i really want to un do all my hard work and determination.???

still bored

i cant explain why? i sometimes feel odd but thats because i get a little anxious. but this is not that. its sorta expectant i guess, like something is going to happen.

i think it might be mr married he was texting me yesterday and i mentioned i was sunbathing...needless to say things got a little heated, sunshine always makes me horny. so a few pics and texts later when i was fully satisfied, it left me thinking why did we never do the deed??

i think we'd be good together, makes me want to find out when my flat mate is on holiday.
thats bad tho.
i cant leave him alone, he sent a bday card to my work place. a funny card. he put 'with love' what does that mean? its love but its not i love you forever kinda love?

i had a good bday very calm and relaxed. good presents nice meal with the family. my flat mate decorated the flat with balloons and banners and she got me a doctor who cake. im a geek and then i get to eat david tennant....life long dream of mine!!

i dislike being another year older tho.

hello!!!!!!! ive been tagged. i must be a bit thick took me a while to work out what was going on!!

1. What I was doing 10 years ago:
i was prob still in school or college. my memory is a little hazy or was i just finishing school?? whatever it was it was educational!

2. What 5 things are on on my to-do list for today (not in any particular order):
have fun and enjoy my bday!!
eat cake(already done, my flatmate got me a doctor who cake!!)
sit in the sunshine and warm my freckles
see my family
paint my toe nails a slutty colour!

3. Snacks I enjoy:
chocolate
olives
apples
cake
cherry tomatoes

4. Things I would do if I was a billionaire:
hmmmmm...give up my current work
start my own business, help my family fiancially. paint more and do something productive. see the world

5. Places I have lived:
my 1st home , my 2nd home and my flat.

I tag:-
cecin
libbysblog
missymay
singleman
uni2010misshome

my work is done. i want some more cake!